I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
only you would photoshop your dick
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
