mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
