I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
