we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
