Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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