Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
