If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
