I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I am naked and annoyed.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Randomize
