Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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