I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
It's never too late to be topless.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
