Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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