Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
