About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
