If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
