We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
