would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
