Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
