I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
