Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize