There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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