You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
