My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
