What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
