we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
