She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
