THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
