my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
