We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
