my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
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