so let's talk penis.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
