So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
