Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
