I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
