love makes seman taste better
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
