Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
