if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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