I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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