I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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