last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
