i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
