fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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