? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
