Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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