yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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