You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
