This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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