This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize