um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
