I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
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