bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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